Sunday, April 25, 2010




Hei Hei stayed with me and my family for about 7 years. We have to keep Heihei indoor as the creepy-crawly loved cuddle in his thick coat if he ever found his ways out of the house. Nevertheless, heihei always tried to sneak out because he loved to talk and explore. He makes friends with anyone that walked past our door; heihei was, of course, the king among my 4 cats.

My wife cried hard that day when heihei died; we didn’t realize he was that frail…he was still playful and pee on the bathmat now and then.

Now, he’s just not around anymore; really find it hard not to think of him…..

Tuesday, April 13, 2010






以前住羽球馆旁松巷的旧屋时,前后门都没装铁门, 除了深夜,平时两道门多数是敞开的,邻居、小孩、猫儿以及鸡只都能自由出入。大门的最大作用就只限于晚间最后一个人将之关上,以便安心就寝。白天门框上有人坐着干活,还是站着话家常,或者斜靠着做白日梦。每天的芝麻绿豆、红白喜事都在门前上演, 那是我小时候观察人生、塑造性格的地方。


Clearly, doors are just a way to get into rooms and/or out of a house. However, our cats never seem to get the picture; they possibly regard every back of a door be another space where they can explore and possess…

To me, the significance of “door” is about at rest versus at work; about simple against complex; about inner against outer thoughts… admittedly, every so often we screen our actual persona behind doors for we are convinced we are or would be vulnerable every time we venture out of the door…

Nevertheless, many things lure us outside the door. Many years ago, mother would often stand and looked into the distance behind those iron gate; maybe due to curiosity, maybe waiting for visitors due to loneliness for she needed support to move around as she could no longer come and go as she desire. I don’t usually spent a lot of time looking at doors, but during those days when they were still around, I would tried to keep my eyes on my parent’s door whenever I pass by hoping to catch father’s silhouette on the door.

Nowadays, it’s pretty normal for every house to install Iron Gate; doors and gates are often shut both in the day and night. It’s really been a long, long time where doors were only fastens for bedtime. It was fun having neighbors, children, cats and chickens moving freely in and out of doors. It’s also a pleasure having people day dreaming, chatting or just leaning against the doors. In fact, it is through the happenings at these doors that help shape my persona and outlook on life…

Having said all that, if it’s taking a laissez-faire attitude to leave the door and gates open; it is extreme restriction to bolt ourselves behind doors. In my younger days, cat and children ramble without restraint outside the house most of the time; now, they are raised inside to have a much safer, healthier life though may be akin to be chained behind bars…..

Thursday, April 1, 2010



每年执教的美术班学生少说也有十多班,每每大家已有相当默契的时候课程便接近尾声, 结束的那一天对于已熟记名字的学生们我会有点不舍。这种体验一年有无数次,周而复始地持续了十来年,情感上确实有点疲惫。

People come and people go; that may be sad, but that’s a plain fact of human relationship. Have been teaching western painting for many years and each year, I see more than 10 classes of both young and adult students. Often when we have a considerable understanding of each other such as be acquainted with people you identify with and your frequency matches so well and that you are comfortable sharing your thoughts with them; it’s near the end of the course. On the last day, bracing myself for all the hellos and goodbye’s can be difficult even though that someone may have stayed in my lives for just a few weeks. Well, I’m truly a little exhausted emotionally after been subjected to this never ending series of “goodbyes” several times a year in the last 10 years…


Sometimes circumstances can create an inevitable rift between intention and reality. I remembered in one of our obstacle test during days in the army; I felt awful and I’m prepared to give a tug to the comrade who’s shorter and slighter in figure that tumble and fell in front of me। However, the warrant officer sternly drives me to move on. I have to leave but I will never forget the pleading look on the young man….


Losing my parents was the most devastating event of my life; nevertheless we move on but some memories never fade away …knowing I would not have time to handle matters but I could not defy mother’s plea for me to stay on longer whenever I visited my parents…


These days, I tried to avoid eye contact with anyone so I would not have a chance to hold on to anyone or anything….however, the goodbyes are still uncomfortable and they make me uneasy....


Life throws surprises at us, good and bad; it’s all in how we take them …that day, we found four abandoned kittens; two black two white, extremely lively and adorable. Right away, we put up an adoption ad in the internet as our unit are really too small to keep all four. When one of the kitty was taken, it does hurt but at the same time we are happy the kitty found a good home. Now, the other three kittens continue to live with us for they have already leave footprints in our heart and we can’t bear to see them go….